In today’s world, there are so many people out there who aren’t sure how to just be themselves. With so much pressure from outside influences and even ones close to home, trying to find who you really are can sometimes be a struggle. I can say this from experience so I know how difficult it is when you are trying to live up to other people’s expectations and nothing is good enough.

The amount of stress it causes is insane. Your friends expect you to live according to how they think is right; your boyfriend or girlfriend expects you to fulfil some unearthly requirements that no mere mortal could ever accomplish; your family members, perhaps, want you to become another version of themselves so they can live their dreams through you… it’s a lot to live up to.

These are situations that test your sanity, making you want to scream, but knowing it will change nothing. These are the moments that show who you really are. I know that for those who are soft-hearted, it can be easy to become a doormat, but that’s not who or what you were made to be. This is something that I found out the hard way.

To those dear souls who are living the life of a doormat and have even the smallest amount of freedom, I’ve been there and I found that I had to stop. I needed to stand up for myself! You, like me, may have some people who stand up for you, but we need to learn to stand up for ourselves too. If one can’t help themself, they can’t expect to be able to help anyone else.

Surrounding yourself with the right kind of people is also really important. You may have friends who treat you like they own you, I know I did and I had to leave them. It is by no means an easy thing to do, trust me. However, it was the best thing for me, as it is for many people. Friends are supposed to support, lift and encourage, not possess, control and tear you down.

You’ve probably heard, “be the change you wish to see in the world.” Let’s be that change. Let’s be kind to that stranger, help those old people, let out our fun side and be quirky… Be ourselves, but remember that we should also treat others the way that we would want them to treat us. If we want others to treat us fairly and without judgement, we have to treat others fairly and without judgement.

This world is so cliquey and judgemental. How much better would it be if people were as kind as they are judgemental! Imagine a world where chivalry was alive and thriving and people treated each other with respect and kindness. Now wouldn’t that be a magical world to live in! This is what people want, right? Are you one of them? If you are, are you chivalrous, kind and respectful?

Most of you have probably seen Star Wars or at least heard of it. The way it portrays the different sides of light and dark paints a very vivid picture of the struggle everyone goes through. Everyone gets tempted to do something dark at some point in their life, but it’s always their choice as to what they end up becoming. There is a story I read online about everyone having two wolves inside that are battling against each other – one good and one evil. The wolf that wins is the one that you feed.

To sum up this post – I have learnt to be myself, not someone else’s expected version of me and I’ll be the best version of myself that I can be, regardless of how difficult it may be, because it’s worth all the effort I put in. Take it from someone who has lived through and come out better for it. It may seem confusing and even impossible, but try it! Take the risk and see for yourself.